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The Cat Horoscope

Beauregard J. Beauceron

Aries (Mar. 21 to Apr. 19)

The Aries Cat is adventurous and energetic, always exploring new areas. Aries cats love to dash about, check out wherever they are. Their pioneering nature leads them in new directions. Their confidence and impulsiveness sometimes gets them into precarious situations, whether it be following a mouse into a corner that's a little too tight or chasing that ball a little too fast on hardwood floors. But the Aries cat will always firmly and boldly assert himself and dive headlong into another escapade, especially if it entails jumping on top of the refrigerator.

Taurus (Apr. 20 to May 20)

The Taurus Cat is loving and cuddly. Taurus cats need their owner's laps and will put up with almost anything just to sit in them. They also love to lay in front of a fire or curled on a blanket. The Taurus cat relishes time with his owner, but will ignore the owner from time to time just to keep a little mystery. Taurus cats are quiet and peaceful and are most comfortable when all is well and secure in their world, especially if there's a scratching post, or sofa, nearby.

Gemini (May 21 to June 21)

The Gemini Cat is a lively cat that gets along anywhere and with most other cats. Gemini cats love to involve their owners in every aspect of their lives, which often includes sharing a recent catch from the back yard. At any age, Gemini cats are youthful and exuberant, inquisitive and a bit devilish. The Gemini cat is versatile and adaptive and absolutely loves a good romp.

Cancer (June 22 to July 22)

The Cancer Cat is protective and caring. When no one is looking, Cancer cats practice arching their backs and hissing. Cancer cats are also emotional and intuitive; they know what's on their owner's mind even if they don't care. Cancer cats can be sensitive and tender, intuitively understanding all that is going on around them. Except why that thing keeps swinging back and forth on the grandfather clock.

Leo (July 23 to Aug. 22)

The Leo Cat is powerful and faithful. They are enthusiastic, full of energy and come when they're called, which makes them the topic of gossip among other cats. Leo cats head pell mell into everything they do. From chasing shadows and dust bunnies to batting around squeak toys, these are active dynamic cats. Leo cats are convinced they are the masters of all they survey, the Leo, after all is a member of the family. Above all, Leo cats are faithful and loyal to their owners, except when a little catnip is at issue.

Virgo (Aug. 23 to Sept. 22)

The Virgo Cat is modest and demure. While the Virgo cat knows he's attractive and handsome, he's reluctant to show off. He knows those frequent baths pay off. The Virgo cat is also reliable and diligent, able to stare at a vent for hours without moving a muscle and then dash off without waiting for a single word of praise. Of course, the Virgo cat overcomes his natural shyness the minute there's a mention of salmon treats.

Libra (Sept. 23 to Oct. 23)

The Libra Cat is easy going and sociable. Libra cats are relaxed in any situation, except maybe those that involve rambunctious children. They love when their owners entertain, often rubbing the legs of the guests for that added touch of hospitality. Libra cats also mingle with the other cats in the neighborhood, and they accept whatever comes their way with a smile and a soft purr. They don't get worked up over anything, except for really appetizing cat food commercials.

Scorpio (Oct. 24 to Nov. 22)

The Scorpio Cat is determined and focused. Whether it's a mouse that needs to be chased or a sunbeam that needs to be laid in, the Scorpio cat will perform the task with unrelenting resolve. Scorpio cats are also passionate and they enjoy everything they do. They are as intense playing and having fun as they are giving themselves a bath. They will focus on whatever they are doing or on an object of their desire with unbroken concentration, or until they hear a tuna can in the opener.

Sagittarius (Nov. 23 to Dec. 21)

The Sagittarius Cat is carefree and loves his freedom. Open spaces and open doors are irresistible invitations to wander and explore. Sagittarius cats are happy, especially when they are outside. It's nice if their owners come out to play, but if not, there are plenty of activities and adventures to keep the Sagittarius cat busy and happy for hours. They also have boundless energy and are happiest when they out in the open. Of course, being inside getting a special cat treat also ranks pretty high on the list as well.

Capricorn (Dec. 22 to Jan. 19)

The Capricorn Cat is patient, careful and deliberate. They don't seem to mind waiting for what they want. They know that eventually, they'll get whatever it is. They'll sit quietly and calmly in the living room, just waiting to pounce once that curtain moves again. Capricorn cats are also committed to their routines. They like certain parts of the house, certain toys and certain people. Any kind of fish, however, is perfectly acceptable. The Capricorn cat is also very disciplined, he wants his owner to know he can be counted on. Especially when the scratching post needs a good workout.

Aquarius (Jan. 20 to Feb. 18)

The Aquarius Cat is friendly and loyal. Aquarius cats love to just hang out with their owners no matter what they are doing, unless it involves bathtubs and water. Aquarius cats enjoy a warm sunbeam, a soft blanket or a fluffy pillow as long as his owner is close by. Aquarius cats are also independent and inventive, always looking for new and different ways to hiss at dogs, spook the goldfish and unravel the yarn in the knitting basket. The Aquarius cat is a true friend in every way, even if there hasn't been any catnip around for awhile.

Pisces (Feb. 19 to Mar. 20)

The Pisces Cat is a kind and loving cat, even around water. They are caring and giving cats, willing to share a toy, a lap or a bird brought in from the yard. Because of their selfless nature they come when they are called, hoping for a treat, but happy with some strokes along the back. Change never upsets them and they adapt to whatever their owner wants. They also enjoy quiet time, comfortable with themselves and content with their lives. The Pisces cat is willing to take anything that comes along, especially if it tastes like salmon.

 


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Thomas Bätzler, Thomas@Baetzler.de
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